Alone is the only home I've ever known.
The others just don't make sense to me,
though I'm drawn to their confusing ways.
~
I envision a panel with countless buttons
that could take me anywhere and even everywhere;
among them is the object of my attention,
drawn instinctively to it by forces that seem to spring out of my core.
That big, juicy, forbidden red button all on its own
that is simply labelled, "NOWHERE."
Oh how I've pined after its embrace,
praying that my caress could find it warm and willing.
Take me away,
my dearest button,
out of this reality
but not into another.
~
This is one of my earliest memories,
wishing for a button that could erase me from existence.
Long before I knew the thrill of intimacy
or the exhilaration of conquest,
all I knew was the profound desire to blink away
out into nothing.