i don't belong here

the world is chauvinistic
and wants to dominate my smile

tiny golden glimpses between the fence
to validate something different

yet its all bullshit
just a distracting hopeless lunge down

im not that way,
or at least i dont know how to be

at least i'm lucky enough
to suffer only discomfort and confusion

there are lives and lines
that carve much deeper into such pain


Like two point blank shotgun blasts to the cranium,
each request left little to the imagination.
She had always been too quick, too brash
for him to keep up on any level she would allow;
and here it was,
drawn out for him on the mental equivalent of yellow snow,
the tumor-ridden husk of a once sanguine attraction
lying doubled over at the threshold of this tiny house.

She was free now
to chase the bigger and the better,
as her pleas had been fulfilled
by his total evacuation from
any shared plane of interaction.

He had forfeited the whole world to abscond,
even if it had been more her style
to participate in this mass delusion most call life.

I will bury you somewhere beautiful

in time

and then when i am alone again

i can dig you up and taste you

for a moment

The toxic air was the only thing keeping me buoyant 
Oh if only i could breath in the disease
A poison poem by someone else,
sent by proxy from good distance;
and with what rhetorical armaments
might you be attacking my reticence?

Some advice:
Pull the plug on anything
that does not strengthen,
and take your energy out
on someone who remains deceived.

Please remain obtuse
with eyes i cannot meet
Our endless gratitude is yours
if only this charade survives

Lets continue to smother
our impossible dreams
in favor of becoming
finally satisfied with living

This tightness in the chest
must be ignored
to allow for prosperity
to sparkle
i was not worthy to bask in the wind
couldnt take the bitter cold
and now as the climate shifts towards warmth
i have run out of air

Sticky Kleenex

In reality she couldn't be farther away from me, 
but in my dreams she is always hiding just out of view. 

Until she remanifests without effort 
to present me with distressing visions
of a life I will hopefully never tangibly endure. 

Last night was too damn much. 

I Must Escape You...

... and it's easier to hate than to miss

This petty rage is unwieldy
and much more inclined to give in to doubt
than to maintain sufficient indignation

It was never a matter of betrayal
though the tension was bolstered to bursting
under the weight of such vacuous deception

In truth only zealots
poised to promote pure chaos
would seek the higher ground
around this labyrinth of flooded trenches
that spans between us

Consenting to resuscitation
can no longer remain
a viable option
if any semblance of prosperity
is sought to survive

All the more precarious
as though made tangible
near-lethal waves of raw magnetism
grasping and poised to eradicate
all progress towards complete withdrawal

So once left to the devices
contained in thoughts of the malevolent and bitter
faithful absention might allow for the degree of dispersal
required to lead each towards unique designs
in the struggle to unearth a worthy legacy


fifteen minutes worth of purge
hair sprinkling into the sink
i wash it all away
and become what's underneath

Inflammation of my attractions,
I am again perplexed by the level of rage that swells up within
At the mere thought of such paltry abandonment.
Overreacting, I know;
But my awareness of my offense does little to quell
This childish fury,
This ape armed swinging
That shakes me from my stride.


The Threesome that Never Was

Open city, winding roads;
a mattress on the floor with friends.
They giggle and speak
something that my ears cannot see.

My imagination kicks into gear
and will not be silenced.
Like a child on his way to ice cream,
there are plans and calculations,
a certain coming to terms with the fact
that these two individuals
seek to reclaim a primordial legacy
in the joining of our wombs.

And like an all-too-familiar dream,
chances are dashed, new plans chrystalized,
and out the door we go
as the mattress sinks out of view behind us.