grand (dream)

the air quivers in delight
as my fingers find those precious keys that sing in harmony,
eyes closed, mind adrift,
in this darkened respite at the edge of some distant festivity

I remember the electric sense of reverberation
and my skin prickled and hair stood on end;
it was as though my body and mind had found
some predestined pathway to nirvana
in those intuitive intervals and notes
played for no one but my self.

the violence that might become (dream)

blasted from the sky, feeling the inertia without all the noise of moving this fast
plunked into shallow water that somehow cushions my vulgar impact
i belong to this creek now as i am washed away
until there is a light with an ominous context
i reach out with my voice and the light is extinguished as a form emerges from the shadows behind
as all inertia has taken form if only to creep me the fuck out
as i am flung into consciousness by some figment in my sleep

i don't belong here

the world is chauvinistic
and wants to dominate my smile

tiny golden glimpses between the fence
to validate something different

yet its all bullshit
just a distracting hopeless lunge down

im not that way,
or at least i dont know how to be

at least i'm lucky enough
to suffer only discomfort and confusion

there are lives and lines
that carve much deeper into such pain


Like two point blank shotgun blasts to the cranium,
each request left little to the imagination.
She had always been too quick, too brash
for him to keep up on any level she would allow;
and here it was,
drawn out for him on the mental equivalent of yellow snow,
the tumor-ridden husk of a once sanguine attraction
lying doubled over at the threshold of this tiny house.

She was free now
to chase the bigger and the better,
as her pleas had been fulfilled
by his total evacuation from
any shared plane of interaction.

He had forfeited the whole world to abscond,
even if it had been more her style
to participate in this mass delusion most call life.

I will bury you somewhere beautiful

in time

and then when i am alone again

i can dig you up and taste you

for a moment

The toxic air was the only thing keeping me buoyant 
Oh if only i could breath in the disease
A poison poem by someone else,
sent by proxy from good distance;
and with what rhetorical armaments
might you be attacking my reticence?

Some advice:
Pull the plug on anything
that does not strengthen,
and take your energy out
on someone who remains deceived.

Please remain obtuse
with eyes i cannot meet
Our endless gratitude is yours
if only this charade survives

Lets continue to smother
our impossible dreams
in favor of becoming
finally satisfied with living

This tightness in the chest
must be ignored
to allow for prosperity
to sparkle
i was not worthy to bask in the wind
couldnt take the bitter cold
and now as the climate shifts towards warmth
i have run out of air

Sticky Kleenex

In reality she couldn't be farther away from me, 
but in my dreams she is always hiding just out of view. 

Until she remanifests without effort 
to present me with distressing visions
of a life I will hopefully never tangibly endure. 

Last night was too damn much. 

I Must Escape You...

... and it's easier to hate than to miss

This petty rage is unwieldy
and much more inclined to give in to doubt
than to maintain sufficient indignation

It was never a matter of betrayal
though the tension was bolstered to bursting
under the weight of such vacuous deception

In truth only zealots
poised to promote pure chaos
would seek the higher ground
around this labyrinth of flooded trenches
that spans between us

Consenting to resuscitation
can no longer remain
a viable option
if any semblance of prosperity
is sought to survive

All the more precarious
as though made tangible
near-lethal waves of raw magnetism
grasping and poised to eradicate
all progress towards complete withdrawal

So once left to the devices
contained in thoughts of the malevolent and bitter
faithful absention might allow for the degree of dispersal
required to lead each towards unique designs
in the struggle to unearth a worthy legacy


fifteen minutes worth of purge
hair sprinkling into the sink
i wash it all away
and become what's underneath